Today I want to share with you ways to give yourself lots of grace. Ladies sometimes we can be too hard on ourselves, especially when it comes to our home, work/business, kids, husband, friendships, homeschooling, parents and keeping up with our volunteer duties at Church. We are always practicing the great juggling act, trying to balance it all. So how do we overcome that voice inside of our head that is telling us we are neglecting one responsibility, for another? I will tell you how, by accepting God’s grace. Below I’ve listed 4 ways to give yourself lots of grace.
1. Accept God’s grace. Click the link to learn more about God’s grace. I like the way Christianity.com defines grace.
Grace is the love of God shown to the unlovely; the peace of God given to the restless; the unmerited favor of God.
God loves us even when we don’t have everything all together, He loves us because He said we are worthy to be loved and forgiven. We are afraid of being judged so we present this flawless life to the world. Perfectionism is the new normal, everything has to be perfect. I can not measure up to that standard, not when we live in a imperfect world. We all have strong and weak points about our makeup. Sometimes we want to boast to others about our strong points and hide our weaknesses. Paul says in 2 Corinthians 12:5-10 instead of boasting about having it all together, boast and rely on the grace of God in your weaknesses so that you are not being perceived as conceited. None of us have it all together, though we like to think that we do. We must rely on God and accept His grace for our lives. God say’s His grace is made perfect in our weakness. Let’s hear Paul’s heart on the matter from scripture.
I will boast about such a man, but I will not boast about myself, except in my weaknesses. Even if I wanted to boast, I would not be a fool, because I would be speaking the truth. But I refrain, so no one will credit me with more than he sees in me or hears from me, or with these surpassingly great revelations.
So to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is perfected in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly in my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest on me. That is why, for the sake of Christ, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
2. Forgive yourself. Forgive yourself for not being perfect.
Hebrews 4:16 ESV
Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need
I tell my family, I am only one person. I can’t do it all at this moment but over time I can do it all. Let’s face it, we plan this perfect schedule hoping to implement everything on our list then something comes up or we’ve allowed ourselves to get distracted and the things on our list gets pushed back for the next day, or next week or next month. Forgive yourself for not rising up to your own expectations and the expectations of others. I know we do not want to let anybody down but the truth is, you will let others down in your life time. Some people will forgive you for not being perfect and others will reject for not being perfect. That is their lost. All you can do is to sincerely apologize to them and move on. Stop beating yourself up about it.
Your life is too important to be spending countless hours worrying about what others think of you. Shake yourself loose and enjoy your life!
I mess up a lot in my writings, Just when I thought I wrote a great post, my husband will point out a grammatical error. He doesn’t do it so I can feel bad, he do it because he wants to see me succeed. Please give me lots of grace, my beautiful readers? I can read over my blog post 4 times and still miss an error. Is this my throne in my flesh that Paul was talking about? I use to get all bent out of shape about this when I first start writing. I quit writing more than 10 times, but there is something in my heart that won’t let me quit. Now when my husband point out my grammatical errors, I just say thank you so much and I go and correct it until it becomes error free. “I love what I do! I am not going to stop so I might as well forgive myself for not being perfect and move on. I hope I am attracting a tribe that feels the same way.
3. Give yourself doses of love. There is a tendency to go into self sabotaging mode when we are not feeling good about something we think we’re failing at. Quiet the negative thoughts and instead give yourself dose of love by getting a massage to calm your mind and body down from all of the stress. Write in your journal about your feelings and end your conversation with positive affirmations and scriptures. Give yourself a hug and tell yourself you are during your best and next time you will do things different to ensure you have a better outcome. Treat yourself to a coffee or tea break, who am I kidding, girl treat yourself to some delicious ice cream. Listen to other women on Youtube that are struggling in the same area you are struggling in and let them encourage your heart until it is content. It always feel good to know that you are not alone. Don’t take your life so seriously, laugh at yourself and make light of your situations, give yourself room to mess up without getting easily embarrassed.
You want to make me feel embarrassed, come to my home when it is not clean! Are you one of those people that shows up to people’s houses unannounced? You probably won’t get into my house if you do that to me. My mom always taught us to keep our environment clean, although I love a clutter free environment, sometimes I fall behind in my house work. I do not have it all together. God told me don’t try to impress people, they will have something to say about you rather you are doing good or rather you are doing bad. God told me I was in pride because I want people to think I have it altogether. The truth is I want people to feel comfortable when they come to my home. Do not compare yourself with anyone. If you really want to feel like you don’t measure up, play the comparison game. I do feel like I will be judged if someone came to my home when it wasn’t clean. I haven’t be delivered from this one yet, but I am working on it. It’s true, some people will judge you. But it’s OK, they don’t have it all together either, make light of the situation and go about your day.
4. Give yourself lots of encouragement. I know I said let others encourage your heart until it is content, but what if there is no one around to encourage you? Then encourage yourself. This reminds me of the story of David.
While David and his men were out to war they left their family and children uncovered, Amalekites enemies of Israel, came down on the village, capturing the women and children for slaves, they killed none of them, but carried them off as they went on their way, When David and his men reached Ziklag, they found it destroyed by fire and their wives and sons and daughters taken captive. David and his men wept aloud until they had no strength left to weep. David’s two wives had been captured David was greatly distressed because the men were talking of stoning him; each one was bitter in spirit because of his sons and daughters.
David men blamed him for what had happened to their families. Everybody turned against David.
David lost his family as well, but no one had compassion for David. What do you do, when no one is on your side? Sometimes in our own life we give our all to everything and everybody, we have our hands in so many projects until all of the balls come tumbling down from our juggling act.
Here is an example of this. Your husband told you to pay the light bill but you forgot to pay it and now you guys are sitting in the dark. You forgot to pay it because you were running late for a meeting that you were over at church, the meeting went over the allotted time because you were trying to clear up something that you were getting accused of that you didn’t do, because of the meeting going over the allotted time, your daughter missed her part in the annual spring concert where she had the leading role. All you were trying to do is help, trying to be all things to all people. Now it seems like everyone is accusing you for not caring about them and their agenda.
Girlfriend, you have to do what David did. You have to encourage and strengthen yourself in the Lord! Don’t allow others to make you feel guilty to the point you loose your power and is all stressed out. David and his men wept aloud until they had no strength left to weep. David was greatly distressed because the men were talking of stoning him; each one was bitter in spirit because of his sons and daughters. But then it said, David went to the Lord in prayer, and drew strength and encouragement from the Lord. David left God’s presence ready to take on the world to retrieve his family and his soldiers families back as well.
David inquired of the Lord, “Shall I pursue this raiding party? Will I overtake them?” “Pursue them,” he answered. “You will certainly overtake them and succeed in the rescue.”
David fought them from dusk until the evening of the next day, and none of them got away, except four hundred young men who rode off on camels and fled. David recovered everything the Amalekites had taken, including his two wives. Nothing was missing: young or old, boy or girl, plunder or anything else they had taken. David brought everything back. He took all the flocks and herds, and his men drove them ahead of the other livestock, saying, “This is David’s plunder.”
You have to keep believing in yourself. You are still a winner. Read my blog post on 5 Ways to Have a Winners Attitude. In order for you to believe you can change your situation around, you have to keep your faith engaged in God and believe in yourself. At some point David stop having a pity party and start back believing in himself. That belief gave him the strength to get back up and fight to win his family back. Follow David’s example and you do the same!
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